I admit it – I eavesdrop. There. I said it. Sometimes I don’t mean to do it, I just have really good hearing and can’t help it... but sometimes people who aren’t really talking to me are just flippin’ interesting. There’s the tone thing – people talk to different people in their lives with varying tones in their voice. For instance, when I was in my early teens I could always tell when my older brother was talking to a girl on the phone. It drove him crazy, well, I drove him crazy... because I always knew just when to embarrass or pester him, but never did it when he was on the phone with a guy friend... why? Because his tone changed the minute it was a girl and I knew he was trying to impress someone (enter evil, grinning demon sister).
Now, I eavesdrop on my kids all the time. Not to invade their privacy, though I guess that’s a hard case to make since I just said I’m listening when they don’t know it, which is pretty much the definition of privacy invading. But to clarify, I don’t dig through my daughter’s diary, or listen in on her phone calls. I do, however, hear them talking from rooms away, and I can see around corners... that’s only because there’s a big mirror in the dining room and they totally don’t realize that I can see and hear them, because they don’t see me – I’ve given them enough hints on this already. When I correct them for saying something wrong or doing something stupid from two rooms away, they should realize that I can see and hear them. In their defense though, they’re 11, 8, and 6, so lucky me, they just think Mommy’s Magic... the eleven year old is convinced I have the place bugged.
But the conversations they have when I’m not in the room crack me up so much, sometimes, I just hope they never totally figure it out. I’d miss this part of their relationship. The non-mom included part.
(Oldest Daughter walks into the kitchen. She’s wearing an oversized tee shirt, raggedy sweat pants and her hair is in the same ponytail she slept in... She’s still sick with a nasty case of strep throat that’s felled my whole family this week... which, by the way, littlest guy was the first one to get and therefore the first one to feel better. Littlest Guy is sitting at the table)
Littlest Guy: Wow! You look disgusting.
Daughter: Thaaanks! Girls just love to hear things like that.
(She sits at table across from littlest terror and he eyes her up and down... just staring)
(He smiles, his big, missing front tooth smile)
Littlest Guy: You’re a fan of Hello Kitty.... Hello Kitty is for babies and you’re a fan...
Daughter: I am not, what are you talking about?
Littlest Guy: See! Hello Kitty! (He points to the tiny pink band-aide on his sister’s finger)
Daughter: Ouch! Hey! (pulling back wounded finger) I’m not a fan, I was bleeding. It was a medical emergency.... What did you want me to do, all we had was hello kitty, should I bleed all over the place?
Littlest Guy: You could’ve used tape.
Daughter: Grrrr.... I’m sick... and cranky... and you’re the one who made me sick in the first place!
(I couldn’t see his face, but I’m convinced he grinned even wider – the classic is, the first two days littlest guy was sick, she doted on him and snuggled him and brought him juice)
Daughter: I’m telling mom you’re bothering me.
Littlest Guy: (Jumping up and standing in front of her) No you’re not...
Daughter: Don’t start that.... sigh... I’m not looking at you... I’m not looking at you... your cuteness is eeeeevil.... I’m not looking at you....
Littlest Guy: (whispers) But, see, I’m doing the puppy dog eyes... see? (with the little high pitched lilt he uses special, for conning, cajoling, and generally getting his way)
As no one ever told mom, I’m guessing points go to Littlest Guy on that one. Anyone want to lay odds on how long it’ll take before the eleven year old loses her temper and cracks him? So far, she lets him get away with pretty much anything, because, as she says often “His cuteness is EEEEEVIL” He is much cuter than I was and my brother never killed me.
How ‘bout you guys? Are you eavesdroppers? Ever notice the different tones people use for the people in their lives. Ever like to be that fly on the wall?