Friday, April 17, 2009

Motherhood Meme - Five things...

Mary Witzl, our own Resident Alien, tagged me with a meme to list five things I love about being a mom... Wow, won’t that test my editing skills – ONLY FIVE?!!!

It might be easier, and more fun to list things that suck about being a mom. You’re allowed to be funnier that way. Like, who among you mothers out there can’t lament the sad state of spit-up stained sweat shirts replacing all your single girl clothes... or previously perky breasts becoming food dispensers rather than date bait? Hmmm, perhaps I’m cynical today... okay, onto the things I love:

I love snuggles for no apparent reason... or even a plotting-to-get-my-way reason. I’m fully aware that my time of being snuggle-worthy is limited. At some point in the not too distant future, snuggling their mother will just be weird. And I’ll miss it. A lot. This morning my littlest guy, who is only in first grade, got out of our van and lifted his little cheek for the mandatory kiss before running off toward his class line. I did my little hop-step toward the other side of the car and turned around like I always do to watch him bounce toward school – and what to my wondering eyes did appear? The little guy was wiping my kiss off his cheek and rolling his eyes with one of his friends. Ack. Knife. In the heart. It’s okay - it is. I remember wanting to distance myself from my mom. I remember not wanting to look like a baby in front of my friends... but I’m pretty sure I was a bit older than six.

I love that each of my kids is their own person – and I love each one of them for who they are. It’s funny, but when you think about having kids in an abstract way, (you know, before the spit up and actual work-a-day world of raising them) you don’t fully realize that you have no control over who they’ll be. None of my kids are exactly like me or anyone else really. Sure, I can see bits and pieces, things I know they got from here or there, but they are their own. Their wit and charm and cunning and chutzpah – that’s all theirs. I’d love to take credit, but I can’t – so I’m content to bask in the glow of their awesomeness.

I love who I am through their eyes. This is something no one prepares you for in parenthood. I am the mommy. Before becoming a mother, I didn’t know how much the title ‘Mom’ would define me. Pluses and drawbacks to be sure. I kind of miss thinking of myself as sexy or salty or a bevy of other things I once was – and still am when I’m not overwhelmed with Mom Mode. But those things don’t compare to the me I am in my kids’ eyes. My kids look at me in a way that makes me want to be that person – the bravest, safest, smartest, surest, best at all things imaginable, person. I’m not quite as cool as they think I am. Like the snuggling, my reign of coolness for them has an expiration date, too, I imagine. But, they make me want to be that. They make me strive to be better than I ever thought I could or even wanted to be just for me.

I love that they’ve completed my circle. They’ve taught me the other side of unconditional love – I learned what it is to be loved without condition or question from my own parents. But to be honest, I didn’t fully understand the giving of unconditional love before my own kids. To be clear, there are a few people who I do love without condition (it’s a rarity, it is) but there are a few who, no matter what they do or where they go or what kind of disagreement we have, I’ll have their back if it means standing in front of a train. No question. My side has been picked since day one. But with my kids, it’s different still. Because they belong to me in a way that no one else can – in the way that I belonged to mine... they complete that circle for me and I hope to be a good marker for them of what it is to love someone, without question or condition.

I love that they tickle me daily with their little peculiarities, views of the world, and funny comments (whether they’re trying to be funny or not). I love that they are my biggest cheering section for things small and large and that they are each others’ biggest cheering section. They are friends, good friends – and they understand something that’s hard to explain, that bond between siblings. They have that in spades... so I know, no matter what happens through the course of their lives, they’ll have each other.

Okay, I’m passing this on to five people. Don’t feel obligated to continue it, but if you have some time, I’d love to see five things from Ello, Erica, Stacey, Jerseygirl, and Julie.

9 comments:

Josephine Damian said...

Awww, how sweet.

Chris Eldin said...

Very nice. I might meme myself with this one...
:-)

Merry Monteleone said...

Hi Josie,

Yeah, yeah, get me on the kids and I gush... maybe I should get back to critiquing where I can be more brutal :-)

Hi Chris,

Oh, I should have meme'd you! Most people hate these things, it's why I give the disclaimer that you don't have to... but sometimes they can be fun.

silken said...

nice list! some of the fun wears off in the teen years, but I'll give it a go. thanks for the tag

Mary Witzl said...

You did this proud, Merry. That wiping-the-kisses off thing hurts like hell, but we all go through it. The first time I saw my kids do it, I did my best not to remember the hours I'd spent in labor.

I wanted to meme Ello and Chris on this one, but I worried that they were too busy! So I hereby violate the rules and meme both of them after the fact.

Merry Monteleone said...

Hi Silken,

I'll pop over and see how it is with teens *cringe at the thought of my future*

Hi Mary,

Thanks! And thanks for the tag... gotta see if Chris put one up.

Ello said...

Ok very nice! I love your list! Now I have to come up with my own huh. Alright. It may take me some time as I am in end of semester mode these days!

sexy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
silken said...

ok, Merry, I finally got one posted...
http://madameblogalot.com/home-kids-family/being-mom/